The Random Rant

Hi Everyone.
I am Stuart and I have a ranting problem. Here it goes.
Why does nobody ever email me? I email them and don't get a response! Why should I even waste my time emailing people who don't respond back, especially about things I trying to organise with them. I've checked my email like 6 times in the last 8 hours and there have been no emails! Except spam, which I've resorted to reading. It's all about stupid drugs i.e. Viagra, which I really need *rolls eyes reallllly sarcastically* (Viagra is really only useful in cases of erectile dysfunction, not normal people) and penis enlargements. "Youre wooman is not satsfyed" really makes you doubt their intellectual prowess.
So yeah, ON TO THE NEXT RANT!!!
Why do all my friends, except a select few, have to be dragged forcibly by the ears to do anything social? I know what they spend their holidays doing. NOTHING, not porn as it probably sounded like. I went into the city once after about 20-something emails between us. We had a large argument in the city to whether we should go to the Koko Black in Lygon Street, Collins Street or Royal Arcade. Despite Tullio and Vetchkin's complaining, we ended up going to the one in Royal Arcade. This whole stupid dispute was over A STUPID STRAWBERRY MOUSSE THINGY!!! We also spent about 2 hours in the VCA and Melbourne University libraries, looking at music. I found this really cool piece called Mein Teddybär, by Ganglberger and it's a concert polka for bassoon! How is it not cool in every way!? So anyway, what kind of sad teenagers spend 2 hours in libraries looking for the Poulenc Clarinet Sonata and then going spastic when we do? I did find 2 wind quartets though, which I was pretty happy about. Our favourite shop is Thomas' Music, which is a really great classical music store. I bought 5 of the Vernon Handley Vaughan Williams set, which is really nice and well conducted too, but everyone else hates Vaughan Williams. Mainly because it isn't halfway music. Personally, halfway music is my least favourite kind of music. I also got a Boost, which was one of the highlighty things of the day. So yeah, it was an okay day.

The Great Jackson Returns!

Ahem.

Well I haven't posted for AAAGES now so it would have to be a very long post to recap most of 2007. So here it is in abbreviated form.

Ward. Reading Journal. Screaming. HWC. Ward Leaving. Celebration. Cas. Yay. Mr. Mark. Poke. Him-EESH. Intermediate Concert Band going wwaaaaaay downhill. Subject Selections. English Language. Maths Methods. Chemistry. Politics. Music Performance. Music Styles by distance ed. Finished Symphony. Happy Face. Exams. Sad Face. Good Marks. Happy Face. AAARGH PRESENTATION NIGHT. Sad Face. Mr. Armstrong. Sadder Face. 983274934 hours personalised learning speech. Rather Bored Face. Medley. Laughing Face. Constanter Ac Fideliter. Constanter Ac Fideliter! CONSTANTER AC FIDELITER!!!1!1!!! Christmas. Saxophone Mouthpiece. Holiday in Sorrento. Face.

That was an incredibly coherent and well structured sequence of sentences now wasn't it? Now seeing as I am so incredibly bored, I will go into more detail about what has happened during the school holidays.

Well we went into the city before christmas... I can't really remember what I bought so stuff. Yeah... I think I bought that 2CD think of Penderecki's early works... Including that awesome cappriccio for violin and orchestra. Hooyay for that. Then we had christmas, and I got a decent saxophone mouthpiece (Selmer) a book (Six sacred stones, Matthew Reilly), various gift vouchers and money, and a few other things which escape me right now. They probably weren't worth remembering anyway. Then a couple of days after christmas we went into the city again and I spent my $100 ALLANS VOUCHER. And they had 20% off too. So now i have a lot of sheet music which is mostly too hard for me and I need to learn some stuff in the next couple of weeks because I'm going to have to play pieces at various auditions. Ah crap. I'm trying to learn my grade 7 list B, which is proving very difficult because half of it is written in A# major, which is very hard to read and has double sharps everywhere. And its at dotted crotchet = 152. Back to the city, I also bought some CDS - Stravinsky L'histoire du soldat - which is good, and it also had Renard, which is a comic pantomime-y thingo. And its in english. and it starts with a rant about death. which is odd. And i also bought that $35 CD of penderecki's flute concerto and clarinet concerto. Which was a waste of money. They aren't that good and are entirely based on other pieces. Grrrrrrr...
Then we went to sorrento for two weeks. I think I can sum up the entire holiday in a few words:
Sleep, Eat, Listen to music, compose, play scrabble.
How exciting. The food was good anyway and I wrote 3 WHOLE MINUTES OF SAXOPHONE CONCERTO! WOOOOOT! Which is 25 pages so it's more than it sounds.
Now I'm back, I'm very bored, and looking for an excuse to insult dvorak.

Holidays

Mlargh. I have been at home almost the whole holidays and haven't posted once. Now I will feebly try to explain what I have done, which you probably don't care about, but I'm going to do it anyway.
Firstly, I went to Caloundra for the first week we were off school to see my half sister, which was good. The weather was nice. Everyone was good. I went swimming heaps. We had a "pre-Christmas", which involved having basically a Christmas dinner a few weeks early, as we couldn't spend Christmas with them. Isaac and Caleb, my nephews, loved their presents. David was good, but had to leave a few days before we left, because of work, which sucked, but yeah.
Secondly, we had the real Christmas, which was good. I got plenty of good presents and also quite a few crappy ones, but you get them every Christmas. Ah... The Spirit of Receiving. I got some good headphones, plenty of vouchers, quite a few books and some other stuff. I also got $160 in vouchers and cash, which I spent a few days later, on Nixon in China and the Violin Concerto by John Adams, God is Not Great, Mutants and Guns, Germs and Steel, which I think was a fairly good buy.
Thirdly, my family has been moving house, which has been ... fun... Actually, it sucks. Don't move house unless you need to, which is the only time you would move house anyway. The computers are over at the new house anyway, so yeah, that's all that matters. It now has some superficial semblance of order.
Finally, I am looking forward to the Siemens Science Experience, which starts tomorrow, which should be good and I get to see some of my friends from MacRob, and MYM Summer School, which should also be fun, as I'm going to see some of my MYM friends and I'm playing bari, which should be fun.
In conclusion, my holidays have been rather dull and uninteresting and I'm almost to the stage of getting glad to be going back to school. Actually wait, I don't think I'll ever be that bored!

FROMG! I HAVEN'T POSTED IN AGES!

Wow! I haven't posted since August. What has happened since August?
Hmmm. My birthday.
That was one crap day. It was nice to catch up with Harry and Matt, though even though the MSO played like total crap and I missed out on half the concert.
We went to Central Australia. That was amazing. Uluru is soooo big. You don't think its actually that big, but when you get close. Its HUGE!!! If you ever go, visit King's Canyon. That is amazing. The resort at Yulara was also good. We had really good seafood, even though the nearest body of water is thousands of kilometres away. We also had some really good food in Alice Springs. If you are ever there, go to QC in Todd Mall; its soooooo good, but fairly expensive.
Term 4 was ok. Speech Night seemed to take over everything, which was not necessarily a bad thing. It went fairly well, except I started to fall asleep and play really badly. I screwed up soooo much.
Now, I'm on holidays! :D I'm going to Queensland tomorrow to see my half-sister and her family, which should be good. After that, there is the mega family christmas, which is always good. I'm also doing MYM Summer School and the Siemens Science Experience over the holidays, but I have plenty of time to catch up over the holidays. Just send me an email!

Ma Voiture est G!

Notice how my titles are getting increasingly random. I have no idea what 'My car is G!' means or if if has ever been used before. Soooo, what should I talk about?
I think I like someone, even though I have only known her a short time. She's smart, good at music, like science and even more importantly LIKES DVORAK!!! WOOOOOOOOOO!!!! HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE SOMEONE WHO LIKES DVORAK!!!! Anyway, I've been chatting to her a lot on MSN. Isn't MSN good like that! Hmm... If she reads, this she will almost certainly know who she is and then my secret will be out. SHOCK HORROR!!!
What else has happened in the last few days?
Well, in my bassoon lesson, all we did was sightreading, which wasn't too bad except I HATE MILDE!!! Who is this mysterious MILDE!! character you may ask? Only the crappiest and most boring composer for bassoon ever!! EVERYTHING HE WRITES IS DEPRESSING!!! FROM ETUDES TO HIS "THREE EASY PIECES"! HOW CAN SOMETHING WITH EASY IN THE NAME BE ONE OF THE MOST DEPRESSING PIECES EVER!!! WELL MILDE MADE IT SO!! Hmmmm...... Maybe I should complain about MILDE!!! ARGH!!!! I HATE HIM SOOO MUCH!!!! more.
So what else has happened.... I finished my Geo assignment. THANK GOD!!!
Anyway, I'm being screamed at by my mum to GO TO BED!!! NOW!!! So I should wrap this up.

Churning the Slut Cushion, Arty Stereotypes and the Winter Concert

Let's start with the start.

THE WORD, SLUT, ATTRACTED YOU DIDN'T IT!!! You were secretly expecting naughty pictures. Alas, no, "Churning the Slut Cushion" has no such meaning. In fact, I don't think it has any meaning at all. :S
Now what do you think "Churning the Slut Cushion" has to do with Arty Stereotypes. If you guessed "ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!!!", you are right, but on to arty stereotypes anyway.
I was really bored in the car yesterday, and I was think about stereotypes and here is the scary stereotype, which I hope I don't ever fit into.
Here are some words which sum it up well

• Latte drinking
• Coffee-table books
• 15 recordings of the same piece ... DVORAK!!!!!
• Concerts at least once a week
• BERET!!!!!

AARGH!!! HOW TERRIFYING!!!!

Wouldn't it be even more sad if these concerts were school concerts! I actually have a school concert tonight.

HOW HORRIBLE!!! Lets start with hmm... ORCHESTRA!!!

ARGH!! How I dread orchestra... Dr Lierse cannot conduct..... Mrs EB (Elton-Brown) is scary..... George (other bassoon player) is a jerk..... Other bassoons are nice..... School captain's charades are entertaining..... Berlioz writes too much for bassoons...... Les Miserables is an odd musical...... The people singing it make it even more odd......

Now on to Stage Band (otherwise to be known as bitching about the incompetancy of the crew)

Stupid crew can't even move a microphone. I MEAN HOW HARD IS IT TO MOVE A BLOODY MICROPHONE!!!! Stupid Steinway piano can't be moved even the slightest without some random old guy coming out and helping us move the piano.....

Now to Concert Band (more bitching)

AARGH!!! IT FEELS MORE LIKE A CHALLENGE!!! WHO CAN SHOVE THE MOST CHAIRS INTO THE SMALLEST SPACE!!!! STUPID CONDUCTOR NEVER CHANGES TEMPO!!! BASSOON PARTS ARE SOOOOO BORING!!! F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F F !!!! HOW MANY Fs CAN YOU SHOVE ONTO ONE PIECE OF PAPER!!!! AS IN THE NOTE NOT THE DYNAMIC MARKING!!!

Now onto Chorale (the less we say about this, the better)

ARRGH! I HOPE NOBODY SEES ME IN THIS!!! :(

AARGHH!!! I HAVENT! POSTED! SINCE! MAY!!!!!!!!!

What has happened in my life since May?
Ummmm urrrrrrrrr, can't remember.....
HOW EMBARRASSING!!
Lets see.
Music:

1. Concerto Concert - Urgh... That was hell... 7 concertos in a few weeks. Most of them too hard for a crappy school orchestra like us. It worked out ok in the end though. *coughs*
2. First MYSB Concert - That was good. We played ROBERT W SMITH'S SECOND SYMPHONY!!!! It's ok. Nothing special though.
3. Bands Bonanza - Yay!! This concert was fun.
4. Winter Concert Rehearsals - Urgh... These are hell... I have one tomorrow and then I AM FREE UNTIL THURSDAY WHEN WE HAVE THE WINTER CONCERT!!! ARGH!!!
5. RANDOM WESTERN THEMES!!! - Hmmm.... This was only last night. I was listening to some random western theme on my iPod. IT IS HILARIOUS!!! My comment on it was "
   OFF BEAT TAMBOURINE!!!
   STRING SLIDES
   BLASTY TRUMPET MELODY!! WITH TROMBONES PLAYING IT AN OCTAVE LOWER!!
   CHEESY STRING MELODY!!!
   OBOE IMITATION OF THE CHEESY STRING MELODY
   CHEESY STRING MELODY RETURNS WITH MORE CHEESY BITS
   MORE CHEESE THAN A CHEESE FACTORY THAT HAS BEEN COVERED IN A CHEESY AVALANCHE OF CHEESE OOZING CHEESE" Doesnt it just scream CHEESY!!!

Wait! This can't be one of my posts without some blatant Dvorak advertising. WOOO!!!! DVORAK!!!!

AND SHE'S BROAD WHERE A BROAD SHOULD BE BROA-OA-OA-OAD!

Sorry about the random title, I just had to steal something from South Pacific.
So lets get back up to date.
South Pacific went great, but I'm still catching up on the work that got left behind. :S
Concertos for the concerto concert are now taking up half my life. :S But that is on Thursday night, BLECH!! And I have exams the next week, which unlike everyone else, I'm not panicking about, because I know exams are always made out to be much bigger than they actually are. I'm much more worried about the assignments that I haven't finished.
Oh well, time for a DVORAK RANT!!!
WOOT!! DVORAK IS SOO SOO GREAT!! ALL OTHER COMPOSERS PALE IN COMPARISON TO HIM!!! ALL HAIL DVORAK!!!!

Camp and Concert

Yesterday I came back from camp which started on Monday. It was really good. We went caving, we made rafts (which ours broke the camp record :D), went through freezing cold tunnels, went bike riding, made part of a bike track, went rock climbing and played word games with our class teacher.
Caving was really good. We had to in one spot put our hands on the other side of this hole and then put our knee over the other side and push across. That was really scary. We also banged quartz together, when you do that it makes a little spark, which is very cool. At the end, we had to do a vertical climb which was a bit scary, but I did it and got out to blog about it.
When we made rafts, it took a long time, but our raft won, due to my amazing paddling skills (lol) and the fact that our raft was more streamlined. It was really fun and I got really muddy, because we had to build our raft on dirt, which turned into mud pretty quickly.
When we did the "river exploration", which was basically going through tunnels, which had been blasted by miners, it was absolutely FREEZING!!! We had to swim out the end of the second one about 20 metres, which felt 1000 times long, because the water was freezing. Once I got out though, I didn't feel so cold, but some people were shivering and turning blue, which was funny.
On the Tuesday, we went bike riding. This was pretty good, except for the training session at the start in camp, where I went over my handlebars and hurt my wrist, but everyone said it was a spectacular stack. Other than that, the ride was good. Some of the places we stopped at were very pretty. One in particular was Scotchman's Creek, which had Naveen's Ravine. It is called Naveen's Ravine, because when he was in year 9, Naveen fell into this two metre deep gap and really hurt himself, some of the boys even screamed. Naveen was also one of the two year 11s who came with us to help. The other was Birinder, or Beer.
On the Wednesday morning, my group started to clear the start of a bike track. I had a rake and removed all the leaf litter and other assorted crap, such as blackberries and grass from the track. At the other end of the area, where we were making the bike track, another group started at the other end, so the track will eventually join. At that end, the person who was clearing did a crap job, as there were blackberries everywhere and you couldn't see the track. On the other hand, my clearing was brilliant, the track was really easy to follow.
When we went rock climbing, I actually got to the top of the wall!!! Ignoring the fact that it was the easiest wall, with all colours, I did really well.
When we played word games with our form teacher, Mr Fairlie, the best parts where when we had to make up a story on the spot out loud, with the title Borat and his ladle on their holiday to Frankston. It was really random, as the ladle ended up in a retirement home and Mr Fairlie and Pamela Anderson also became characters in the story. The other best part was when we had to do one of those the person says a type of word and you write a word of that type and then pass it on and repeat that, until you get a story. One of the stories had the two characters as Renee Zellweger and Renee Zellweger, and another story had a majestic penis. My ending was that almost everyone died and those who didn't became emos and slit their wrists and died.
On Thursday night, I had to leave with a couple of friends, which kinda sucked, but I had a concert, which turned out well. First I had Chorale, which I had seen two of the songs we sang once before and the other one twice, so I think I sang pretty well with no idea of the words.
Second I had Stage Band, which was really good, I screwed up quite a bit in Smooth though. I added in a few seconds, which sounded bad.
Third I had Davis Band, which is a concert band, which was easy.
Last I had Orchestra, which was pretty hard. I need to double-tongue in William Tell as my tongue cant go that fast and learn and practice the bit at the end of Hungarian March.
How could I not end on a Dvorak rant! Here it is!
The only thing that sucks about Orchestra is we aren't playing any DVORAK!!!
DVORAK IS SOO BRILLIANT!! BEETHOVEN IS ALMOST AS BRILLIANT BUT NOT AS BRILLIANT AS DVORAK!!!! DVORAK!!!! YAY!!!!!

FROMG! ANOTHER "FROMG! ANOTHER "FROMG! ANOTHER POST!" POST!!" POST!!!

WOW!! I've lost all ability to name my blog entries. Oh well. They'll just all have to be called something like this.
Anyway back to more recent events. I got my english essay back today!! I got an A!!! AND I WAS ON TIME!! WOW!!! HOW RARE!!!! I got a HD2, which is exactly the same as an A but it sounds crappier. At MHS, they have changed the marking system.

• HD1 = A+
• HD2 = A
• D1 = B+
• D2 = B
• C1 = C+
• C2 = C
• S1 = D+
• S2 = D

I mean how gay is that. A D is better than a C. WTF!!!
Anyway, i shall now end my post with some boasting about DVORAK!! YAY DVORAK!! DVORAK AND MY ALL MIGHTY ADMINNESS!!! ARE ON A PAR OF BRILLIANCE!! BRILLIANCE!!!